How To Grill- Carrie Style

Step 0ne- Buy the cheapest grill you can find, in this case, the 15.00 variety at Cub Food.

Step Two- Forget to buy necessary things for grill such as Charcoal, Lighter Fluid, and one of those plastic lighter thingies that are suppose to be used with grilling.

Step Three- Go to Walmart and grocery store the day after to buy grilling ingredients, and self starting charcoal.

Step Four- Assemble cheap grill, put in Wal-Mart brand Self Starting Charcoal, and then attempt to light using matches

Step Five- After half an hour of trying to light self lighting charcoal in heavy wind, shred up newspaper, and put around self starting charcoal, again, use matches to light. Jump up and down because paper trick seemed to work.

Step Six- Check grill. Realize it is not burning. Go to Walmart to buy plastic lighter thingy. Come back, move grill to non-windy side of apartment building, figure out the child lock on lighter thingy, and then attempt to start self starting charcoal, with slightly charred paper.

Step Seven- Go to nearest hardware store to get lighter fluid.

Step Eight- Watch gigantic flames shoot out of grill, with self starting charcoal, and slightly charred paper. Dance around in delight at your genius for buying lighter fluid. Put top on grill.

Step Nine- Check the grill, realize that when you put the top on, it put out the flame. Re-Add lighter fluid, and then watch grill until flames go away.

Step Ten- Call the technical support line for internet, because internet is not working.

Step Eleven- Check grill- still burning

Step Ttwelve- Start cutting up ingrediants for shrimp skewers- frozen shrimp, thawed, red and green pepper, mushrooms, and summer squash. Yum- skewer, dash salt, minced garlic, and Mrs. Pepper southwest chipotle seasonings. Yum!

Step Thirteen- Put skewers on grill. Wait. Knit the heel of your most current sock. Check skewers. Only slightly warm. Knit more of the heel on most current sock. Check again- Flip Skewers, wonder why they are not hot, only warm.

Step Fourteen- Knit more rows. Check skewers, find a way to move them closer to charcoal.

Step Fifteen- Get pissed that after three hours of work, you have only warm shrimp skewers, that you can no longer wait. Bring them in, consider microwaving, but decide to eat. Realize you have a winning recipe if only they were hot, and consider the day a success.